11.30.2006

waiting and dreaming

I think it is fitting that our 3 month novitiate anniversary coincides with the beginning of Advent, a time of waiting. Waiting can be an active and intentional activity, rather than a passive one. This past week, we talked about the Annunciation in both our classes at the Intercommunity Novitiate (Personal Integration and Theology of the Vows). In our conversation, I was struck deeply by two things. One was the idea that while God initiated the call, God waited for Mary to answer just as God waits for us. Think about that ... God waits for us! The other was the idea that when Mary said yes, she said yes to a mystery. She didn’t know what she was saying yes to, and if anything she was saying yes to an adventure. As our Groovy Constitutions say:

As we live our vows each day
we trust that Christ’s blessing promised
to peacemakers will sustain us,
knowing that God working in us
will accomplish more than we can ask
or imagine. (Constitutions 62)

That about sums up where I find myself right now. Taking each day as it comes, thanking God each day for the invitation, saying yes each day to the call to be a peacemaker, knowing that even though it seems impossible to me sometimes, all things are possible for God. When God dreams, God dreams bigger than I can imagine.

11.29.2006

Dorothy Day 11/8/1897 - 11/29/1980

Sometimes our hearts are heavy with the tragedy of the world, the horrible news from Vietnam, Brazil, Biafra, the Israeli-Arab war. And here it is Advent and Christmas time again, and with it the juxtaposition of joy and sorrow, the blackness of night, brightness of dawn. What saves us from despair is a phrase we read in the Life of Jesus by Daniel-Rops, "getting on with the business of living." What did the women do after the cruxifiction? The men were in the upper room mouring and praying and the women, by their very nature, "had to go on with the business of living." They prepared the spices, purchased the linen cloths for the burial, kept the Sabbath, and hastened to the tomb on Sunday morning. Their very work gave them insights as to time, and doubtless there was a hint of the peace and joy of ressurection to temper their grief.
- Dorothy Day, quoted in The Dorothy Day Book

11.27.2006

synchronicity

I decided to end my day praying with Sacred Space, which I haven't used in quite a while. One of the beginning prayers caught my attention. It is so similar to how I ended my last post!
A thick and shapeless tree-trunk would never believe
that it could become a statue, admired as a miracle of sculpture,
and would never submit itself to the chisel of the sculptor,
who sees by her genius what she can make of it. (St Ignatius)
I ask for the grace to let myself be shaped by my loving Creator.

postcard from not quite on the edge

Thanks to everyone who responded to my edgey post either in the comments or by holding me in prayer.

I thought I'd post a quick non-update before I head away from the computer for a few days - we head to our Intercommunity Novitiate program in the morning. Don't want my bloggy friends thinking that I've gone over the edge!

Sometimes I find that I need to get to the breaking point before I can see the light. I think that's a universal truism as well as being a cliche. What I'm also beginning to have drilled into my head by my lovingly persistent and mischevious God is that life is cyclical. I will have freak outs again, just as I will have aha moments and those moments - like now - of being ok not knowing. As one of our presenters said a few weeks ago, "authentic humility is to learn to live with the discomfort of what is unfinished in me." It's helpful for me from time to time to remind myself that I am God's work of art. At the moment I'm feeling more like a formless blob, but God's still working and at the moment at least I'm feeling more able to trust in that.

Peace Out,
Susan

(The postcard is from Fort Lee, NJ - the neighboring town where I went grocery shopping earlier today!)

11.26.2006

birthday meme

My birthday is MONTHS away, but I saw this meme chez Seeking Something and thought I'd play along. It's been a while since I did a meme other than the Friday Five.

1. Go to Wikipedia.

2. In the search box, type your birth month and day but not the year.

3. List three events that happened on your birthday:

July 27, 1549 - Jesuit priest Francis Xavier's ship reached Japan
July 27, 1921 - Researchers at the University of Toronto led by biochemist Frederick Banting announce the discovery of the hormone insuline.
July 27, 1963 - Korean War Ends


4. List two important birthdays and one death

born July 27, 1967 - Juliana Hatfield, American Musician

born July 27, 1974 - Pete Yorn, American Musician
died July 27, 1946 - Gertrude Stein, American writer


5. One holiday or observance (if any)

Feast of the Seven Sleepers (depicted in the picture)


11.25.2006

postcard from the edge

CAUTION: If you're looking for a happy groovy nun post, you might want to skip this one. This post of more of the wondering in-my-head kind of post. You might even call it a musing of a discerning woman. It's the kind of post I hesitate to publish to the blog these days, knowing that people who are thinking about religious life are regular visitors. I don't want to scare anyone. But the spiritual journey is not all roses and ice cream sundaes. There are those moments, and I suppose sharing those moments as well as the discernment sundaes & bouquets is what this here blog is all about. So here you go ....

I talked with my good friend the
Turtle Lady today. It was our first on the phone chat since I left for Jersey, although we've been staying in touch via a little thing called e-mail. Anyway, half way through our conversation, I realized that she was walking and talking on her cell phone. Turns out she was walking in my/her old neighborhood, and at one point she said she was walking right by my old apartment! And wouldn't you know it, my former landlord was finally getting around to the landscaping he promised to do YEARS ago. Although I'm willing to bet he never actually finishes it.

But I digress. The end result of this lovely conversation with an old friend was, predictably, a bout of homesickness. And a twinge of the "what am I doing here's."

I KNOW what I'm doing here. I know in my heart that this is where I'm meant to be, to continue to discern my call to follow Jesus in the company of some very groovy sisters. But in this time of novitiate that's not a time and this place that's not a place, it's fairly easy to get into the wonderings. It's part of the package I think.

I left some wonderful friends, a dynamic parish community, an active social justice ministry and a City that I loved which the NYT told me today is attracting loads of young hipsters in the 18-34 range. I of course turned 34 and left Portland a month later.

And here I am on a Saturday night with a good group of people, with a roof over my head with an awesome view, with all my material needs met and the resources to follow this journey. But still I find myself wondering ...

I think the key is to remember that I didn't enter the community to be a novice. I have to be a novice to enter the community. I need to trust that Jesus knows, that the Holy Spirit is with me on this journey, that my Creator can and will do things I cannot even imagine.

Please pray for me, my fellow groovy novices and all novice of religious communities. All will be well I know, but a few prayers can't hurt!

Ok, heady musing over ... for now!

11.24.2006

nyc sunset


Taken by yours truly from our roof this evening at sunset. ... Our founders certainly had great taste in real estate!

black friday five

Today is the day after Thanksgiving. Used to be it was the start of the Christmas shopping season, but that started weeks ago! In any case, it is the busiest shopping day of the year. Some call it Black Friday. For others it is Buy-Nothing Day. For the Revgalblogpals, it's a topic for the Friday Five so here goes!

1. Would you ever/have you ever stood in line for something--tickets, good deals on electronics, Tickle Me Elmo? I have stood in line for Star Wars Movie tickets. And Lord of the Rings. Oh yeah, when SW Episode 1 came out my friend CoCo & I stood in line at Toys R Us when the Star Wars toys came out. The mad rush was crazy. I'm not sure we even ended up buying anything. In general though, and especially these days, I am not inclined to stand in line to buy something.

2. Do you enjoy shopping as a recreational activity? Nope. I used to enjoy it as a therapeutic activity, but thanks be to God I got over that delusion. Now I shop when I need something. Or when I really want something, as today I went to Barnes & Noble and bought 2 mystery novels that I by no means needed but definitely wanted. That said, I went into the store, found what I wanted and headed straight to the check out. No browsing involved.

3. Your favorite place to browse without necessarily buying anything. Book stores (even though I just said that I didn't browse in one today!). I used to browse for new books and then put them on hold at the library.

4. Gift cards: handy gifts for the loved one who has everything, or cold impersonal symbol of all that is wrong in our culture? A wee bit impersonal, but oh so helpful! I used a gift card to purchase my 2 mystery novels today in fact. And I'm still nursing along the Starbucks gift card I got from my old job.

5. Discuss the spiritual and theological issues inherent in people coming to blows over a Playstation 3. Well, a little known fact about me is that I survived 5 K-Mart Christmas shopping seasons as a cashier & customer service supervisor. I remember the Tickle Me Elmo shortage. I remember numerous other "shortages" and the angst and devastation in the parents/spouses/loved ones faces when they could not obtain "the" gift for their loved one. Sometimes I think it comes down to wanting to please said loved one which is a good thing, if a bit misguided in outlet. Other times I think the concept of people coming to blows and fighting over grossly overpriced pieces of electronic equipment is not only misguided, it's sad and tells us that there is a great deal missing to fill people's souls with goodness in our society.

11.23.2006

A groovy thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone! This is my 2nd Groovy Turkey Day. Last year I was with my Groovy Sister Reserves Community in Seattle. This year of course I'm with my Groovy Novitiate Community in New Jersey. Who would have thought?? Our kitchen was a hotbed of activity yesterday. Lots of chopping and mixing and other assorted turkey day prep tasks. We're having 5 folks over for dinner today. We're also having liturgy in the house with our groovy priest friend before dinner (hi Terry!). He is of course one of the aforementioned 5 dinner guests. Lots to be thankful for this year. Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

11.22.2006

thanksgiving action for Darfur

I received this by e-mail the other day. People are often spurred to do something for those in need on Thanksgiving ... helping at a soup kitchen, donating nonperishable food, etc... Those are all great things, but here's a way to raise awareness about what's happening to our neighbors in need in Africa.
Thanksgiving is a time of year to count our blessings and to reach out to those who are not as fortunate.

That's why we're asking if you would be willing to devote five minutes of your Thanksgiving celebration to helping the people of Darfur.

It's easy. Just spend a few moments explaining the crisis to your guests (we will supply you with a one page overview that you can read from if you're uncomfortable talking off the cuff) and then pass around a printed petition to President Bush and the UN Secretary-General for your guests to sign.

Or just turn on your computer, pull up http://www.SaveDarfur.org/Thanksgiving and let your guests sign the petition online to save the trouble of mailing back the filled in printed petition back to us.

Can we count on you? Click here now to let us know if you're willing to help out the people of Darfur this Thursday.

We'll make sure you have all the information you need to educate your guests and empower them to get involved.

Happy Thanksgiving from all of us at the Save Darfur Coalition.

Thank you again for your support.

Sincerely,

David Rubinstein
Save Darfur Coalition

11.20.2006

ripped from the headlines

Or rather, ripped from the a conversation I was having with one of my novicey friends the other day ...

Me: You know, I've been thinking.
Novicey Friend: Good.
Me: You know how little kids sleep alot when they're going through a growth spurt?

Novicey Friend: If you say so.
Me: They do. Or at least I think they do. Anyway, like I said I've been thinking. Growing is hard work. It makes you tired. And spiritual growth is exhausting!
Novicey Friend: Yup.

Before I entered the Novitiate, I was frustrated because no one could explain what the experience was like to my satisfaction. Now here I am in the midst of what I can only describe as an amazing and transformative experience, and I can't explain it either. It's something you need to live through, and I bet it's a different experience for every novice. Our Constitutions describe the Canonical Year as a time when "a novice focuses primarily on her transformation in Jesus Christ." That sounds so nice, doesn't it? And it is such a gift to to have this time to begin what I'm realizing this is really a life long journey. But it's also hard work in many ways. Almost 3 months in, the lived experience is wonderful and messy and hard and surprising and heartening and many other things that at the moment means that I am exhausted! Good thing I've got a nice comfy bed...

Peace Out my bloggy friends!

11.19.2006

thanksgiving & delurking

My revgalblogpal Reverend Mommy visited earlier and told me that it is Thanksgiving Delurking Week! From her blog:

There are so very many things in our lives that we can be thankful for. I personally, am thankful for such a wonderful group people represented by the RevGals and BlogPals and our community here online. ... We are having a Thanksgiving Delurking week! ... Place this image on your blog and announce Delurking Week, starting today and running until the 26th. When you visit a blog, you can either just say "Thank you for blogging" or ... whatever verbage the Spirit moves you to leave.

So let the delurking begin! Not sure what that means? Do you read a blog? Do you leave comments on said blog? If not, you are a "lurker." Lurkers are welcome here. But it's nice to know who I'm musing to, so how about saying hello??

Thanks for stopping by
Susan

11.18.2006

88% Thankful

I've got lots going on right now in my thoughts, feelings and prayers - mostly unbloggable. I had a great visit with my spiritual director this morning but it's got me in the unbloggable zone. And so I give you a silly blog quiz (Thanksgiving themed)

Drumroll please ...

You Are 88% Thankful

You're an incredibly thankful person, and everyone around you feels very appreciated.
You inspire people to be more optimistic, forgiving, and grateful.
How Thankful Are You?

And yes, for the record, I am feeling very thankful. Thankful to my loving God for inviting me on this journey to self discovery & God discovery. Even with the ups and downs and insides and outs, I feel amazingly gifted to be on this journey.

11.17.2006

my tree has no leaves

When I arrived at the Novitiate House in September, the tree outside my window was fully covered in green leaves ... even if they weren't the healthiest looking leaves.

As the weather cooled a bit, they began to turn a rusty orange, one by one. Some of the leaves seemed to change overnight. Others appeared to resist the change - one tip would stay green as the rest of the leaf was transformed.

Over the past few weeks, the leaves have been slowly falling off the tree, their job done. But as of yesterday, there was still a healty smattering of orange. Until last night ...

We had a window rattling storm last night. When I opened my blinds this morning, the first thing I noticed was my lovely view of the George Washington Bridge & the NYC skyline. But then I realized ... wait, I can't normally see that! I guess it's what they call a "winter view" - now that the leaves have gone to leaf heaven, I can see through the leafless branches. I suppose resistance is futile - whether the leaves were ready to go or not, they are gone.

Cliched as it may seem, I'm feeling a bit like my tree this morning. I came with lots of leaves - expectations, past history, hopes, fears, demons, etc... They weren't all the healthiest of leaves. One by one though my leaves began to transform. Two and 1/2 months into this experience, and I am not the same person. This is of course not to say there hasn't been, and doesn't continue to be, resistance to the change. Who will I be? How will I be? Only God knows the answers to those questions.

The transformation is by no means complete, it continues each day. At the moment it seems like my leaves have fallen and my branches are bare - the inner journey can feel that way at times. But that process also allows you to see beyond the trees. Winter is coming, but so is Spring and Summer and another Fall.

11.15.2006

This nun has a blog but no veil

While I was away at my intercommunity novitiate program, Time Magazine came out with an article subtitled: "More young women are entering convents. How they are changing the sisterhood." Interesting ... Of course the main title is "Today's Nun has a Veil - And a Blog."

I'm a bit tired from two days of classes on Personal Integration & the Vow of Consecrated Celibacy (light hearted topics!), but I can't NOT comment on the Time piece - and I've already had 2 folks e-mail me about it!

The veil ... this reminds me of telling my 9 year old niece that I wouldn't be wearing a habit. "But," she said looking very concerned, "then you won't be a real Sister." I patiently explained that yes, I would still be a real Sister. Being a Sister, I told her, is about giving your life to God and helping people in need. Some Sisters wear habits and some don't, but they are all committed to God. 'Ok," she said very dubiously. "But will you at least wear black?".

The irony of course to those who know me is that 75% of my wardrobe is black. At this exact moment I'm wearing a black sweater, black tights and a jean skirt. I'm also wearing the Peace Cross, the symbol of identification with my community. Obviously, my community does not wear a habit, which is a good choice for me.

I've written about "the habit question" before. I find it so interesting that talk of something as radical and countercultural as giving one's whole self to God is summed up by the accompanying fashion choice. When I was coming out the closet as a nun-to-be, I was constantly surprised by peoples' deeply held opinions on the habit question. Like my 9 year old niece, many felt that real nuns wear habits. Others felt that habits were a relic of antiquity whose days had passed.

My experiences these past two months in the intercommunity novitiate program (where half of the women wear a habit and half don't) have led me to believe that it's a both/and not an either/or proposition. I respect that some women religious wear the habit. For them and for those they come into contact with, the habit is a visible symbol of their consecration. It is a "God sign" in the world. Other women religious wear simple everyday dress. For them and for those they come into contact with, their everyday attire is a symbol that they are approachable signs of God in the world.

God calls us all. God needs us all. And the people of God need us all. For some, they need to see a Sister in the habit to remind them, give them comfort, or who knows what. For others, the habit would be a barrier that would prevent them from getting close to this woman and experiencing God through her. Which is why, even today God is calling women to BOTH types of communities. And they are answering, as the equal division of habit/simple dress in my intercommunity program attests to.

I'm rambling. Like I said, I'm tired and it's time to head downstairs for evening prayers.

In closing, even though the article focused in on the fashion question, it's a good article. Anything that helps people realize that yes, people still do this, is a good thing in my opinion.

Bloggy friend Julie is quoted in the article and her blog is linked. She's got her own perspective on the habit question that I recommend checking out.

11.13.2006

scatterbrained?

As seen chez Sister Christer.

Which Pooh character are you?


Sometimes your creative solutions land you in sticky situations but you remain adventurous and undaunted by failure. You posess an infectious confidence and deep thinking comes naturally to you.Always on the go with many paws in many pies, Rabbits can appear slightly manic to others. But not to worry, you have everything under control... most of the time.
Take this quiz!



11.12.2006

sharing

Every once in a while, or perhaps more often than that, I find myself wondering .... why on earth am I sharing my journey on this blog.

For one thing, it is very hard to share my story without sharing the details of the lives of the people I live with. Now that I'm a Novice, there's also a certain feeling of responsibility. Yes I have a disclaimer, but in a way I represent "the Church." Hence there's a fair amount of self-censoring that takes place here.


At times it seems like pointless navel gazing. And perhaps dangerous in another way ... who am I to think that people want to read my random musings?
So it's a struggle. Today in particular I was wondering ... how do I share the real inner journey without scaring people? How do I explain the transformation that I don't understand myself. And why do I want to even try?

Then I checked my e-mail. In my experience, God often works through strangers in our lives. And wouldn't you know it, I received an answer to the questions I hadn't articulated from someone I don't even know who has been reading the blog for a while. She is discerning a vocation to a different community and is drawn to a more traditional devotional spiritual practice than this self-described groovy novice.

She said a few things that really spoke to me. One was that I have helped her to gain an appreciation for richness of spiritual expressions in our Catholic tradition and the wide variety of women's religious communities. My own experience at the intercommunity novitiate has reinforced this. I love that our Church is big enough to hold jeans wearing feminist nuns like myself and habit wearing more traditional nuns. More than that I am becoming convinced that our church NEEDS both/and. (That's a post for another day.)

But there was something else she said in her e-mail that I really needed to hear today. Hope you don't mind my friend, but I'm going to quote you here: "More by what you don't say in your blog(these days) than by what you do, I recognize the wrenching experience of self-knowledge that the discernment process brings to my life is also happening (even more deeply) in yours. And this encourages me and gives me hope for the future of religious life."


The wrenching experience of self-knowledge. That so encapsulates the nonbloggable thoughts I've been having. I wish I could share them but I can't. But that's ok ... Maybe someday I will be able to.

I feel so blessed to be on this difficult and challenging journey. This invitation to get to know God more deeply, to get to know myself more deeply. And as to this crazy blog experiment, maybe there is a reason for it other than my own ego.
I hope so anyway.

We are relational people. It is by sharing our stories that we get in touch with our human journey and our journey home to God. And so I write ... but for now, it's time for bed. Prayers are bright & early in the morning!!

sunday dinner

On Sundays we head next door to have dinner with some of our elder Sisters (dinner being their big noon time meal). It is quite honestly one of the highlights of the week.

Our Congregation Novitiate House is on the grounds of the province headquarters and a large group of retired sisters live next door in the infirmary and on the assisted living floor. Normally our two worlds are connected physically but separate in reality. We cook our own meals in our house. But on Sundays, we head next door. It's a good chance for us to get to know them better. And vice versa.

After dinner today one of the Sisters invited us up to see her room. She gave us the grand tour, sharing not only her home but her heart. What I love about these dear women is their warmth and happiness. Yes they are aging. Yes some of them are not so spry or in the best of health. But every day is a gift, every day brings surprises which they welcome just as they welcome us into their homes & hearts.

(The photo by the way is borrowed from our groovy website. It is actually taken in the dining room next door.)

11.11.2006

the "god gap"

Interesting article in today' WaPo - "Democrats Win Bigger Share of Religious Vote: Parties Disagree on Why Gap Has Narrowed."

Possible explanations?

Evangelical Christians are "fed up with the Republican leadership, particularly in the House," said the Rev. Richard Land, head of the public policy arm of the 16 million-member Southern Baptist Convention. "They're disgusted that Republicans came to Washington and failed to behave any better than Democrats once they got their snouts in the trough."

Or ...

And James Dobson, founder of Focus on the Family, issued a statement saying that "many of the Values Voters of '04 simply stayed at home this year" because the Republican Party has "consistently ignored the constituency that put them in power." [The next paragraph points out that in fact white evangelical Protestants turned out this week as heavily as they did in 2004, making up roughly 24 percent of the electorate both times.]

Or ...

People really care about right and wrong more than right and left, and their antennae were up about corruption and the war in Iraq and kitchen-table moral issues -- health care and poverty," said Alexia Kelley, executive director of Catholics in Alliance for the Common Good, a group that set out this year to challenge the religious right's hold on moral issues.

Whatever the reason, I find it interesting and encouraging on several levels. For one thing, we are talking about God in more than just narrow terms and hot potatoe issues. I came of age politically when the conservative religious swing began 20+ years ago (being from a political family I was an early bloomer). I think it is healthy that we have more diversity and dynamism in our political/religious involvement in the body politic. Rather than simply using litmus tests, it seems to me that our faith calls us to look critically at the issues and vote for the common good of ALL, especially the poor and vulnerable. This will naturally stump the pundits from time to time, which is not necessarily a bad thing.

Who knows, maybe we're moving in that direction?

11.10.2006

shifts

Plenty has been written (and will continue to be written) on the pending shift of power in Washington. All I'll say here is that it is not unwelcome in my opinion, but my hopes and prayers are that the transition will be respectful and meaningful. Respectful in that I hope it doesn't turn into nasty retribution and meaningful in that I hope some positive steps are taken to improve the quality of life of the poor and vulnerable. We will see what happens ...

I watched the election results Tuesday night with some of my new novicey friends at our Intercommunity program. A small group of us gathered around the television there. This has been a ritual for me my entire life, and so I was glad to have folks to share the experience with. But it was an almost surreal experience for me. For the first time in 8 years, I was not involved in the election in an official capacity. Even more than that, even though I'd voted and was interested in the outcome of the elections, I wasn't as engaged as I usually am.

The moment marked a shift that has been taking place in my own life. I am no longer who I was. I am not yet who I am becoming. On one level this is scary and strange, but on another level it feels completely right. I am still me, but in a different way. It is good to know that I am still me, but at the same time it almost feels like I'm walking on shifting sands as I navigate the world in different ways.

well, there's my note from my alternate novitiate reality for the evening. ...

11.09.2006

wish it felt this way at the moment

You Have Fantastic Karma

You are a kind, sensitive, and giving person.
And all your good deeds will pay off - if they haven't already.
But you're not so concerned with what you get in return anyway.
You have an innate caring nature - and nothing can change that!

11.08.2006

me defined


Susan Rose --
[noun]:
A beat poet working the streets
'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com

As it turns out, I do have a few minutes to check in during this busy week. Thanks to Sister Christer for the self defining toy. My other options (I kept trying again) were "benevolent to a fault," "a person who likes to steal cans of tuna," and "like in nature to a kangaroo."

We had good classes this week at our intercommunity Novitiate program. We're had our 2nd of 5 sessions on Personal Integration. This week we focused on liminality and resistance. Liminality is living betwixt and between where transformation can take place. In this context, novitiate is like the 40 years in the desert in the exodus experience. And while in the desert, one is likely to experience some resistance. You want to change, but as our presenter said resistance illustrates that our desires often do not have feet.

The cumulative effect of the past two weeks has been the recognition that all the crazy thoughts, feeling and emotions of the past few weeks are not only natural, they are to be expected. We all experience liminality. Changing jobs. Moving to a new town. But the Novitiate is a particular created liminal space. The uprootedness is not only a natural feeling, it is an intended one. It is the uprootedness that allows the transformation to take place. I now understand why a wise soul I was sharing with the other day laughed when I said that Novitiate feels like being in exile, but I suppose everyone should go through an exile experience at some point.

So much to reflect upon. Who knows, maybe it will even give me some context to share some of my non-bloggable novicey thoughts. After further reflection of course, not to mention our next 3 classes. Stay tuned ....

11.06.2006

away from the blog

Well folks, I'm headed to my Intercommunity Novitiate program for a few days. I probably won't have a chance to check in until Friday.

If you are eligible, don't forget to VOTE on Tuesday.

If you're a friend from the beautiful Pacific Northwest, stay dry!!! My latest e-mails from friends back home have included news of a car being smashed by a tree and claims that it's time to start building an ark. I then checked the news and the headline is "Last of typhoon creates flood alert." Then I see that there was a small earthquake yesterday!

Egads! I think I'll continue enjoying this nice fall we're having in Jersey. I'll start complaining once winter comes though.

Peace Out for now,
Susan

11.05.2006

it's Sunday

It's Sunday and so for some reason I give you random blog quizzes. Enjoy!

You Have a Melancholic Temperament

Introspective and reflective, you think about everything and anything. You are a soft-hearted daydreamer. You long for your ideal life. You love silence and solitude. Everyday life is usually too chaotic for you.

Given enough time alone, it's easy for you to find inner peace.
You tend to be spiritual, having found your own meaning of life. Wise and patient, you can help people through difficult times.

At your worst, you brood and sulk. Your negative thoughts can trap you. You are reserved and withdrawn. This makes it hard to connect to others. You tend to over think small things, making decisions difficult.


Your Life Path Number is 8

Your purpose in life is to help others succeed

You are both a natural leader and a natural success. You are also a great judge of character. You have a head for business and finance. You know how to make money. A great visionary, you can see gold where other people see nothing.

In love, you are very generous - with gifts, time, and guidance.

You love to inspire people, but it can be frustrating when they don't understand your vision.Great success comes easily for you. But so does great failure, as you are very reckless.
You are confident, and sometimes this confidence borders on arrogance.

11.04.2006

once an elections officer

You can take the elections officer out of the elections office, but you can't take .... or however that goes. In any case, it's almost Election Day! If you haven't done so yet and you are eligible to do so, be sure to vote.

I'm not here to tell you how to vote ... there are plenty of nasty television ads and glossy voter guides that try to do that. If you happen to be Catholic, I would suggest at some point trying to slog through the US Bishops' Document Faithful Citizenship. It's by no means easy or exciting reading, but it has some key concepts that help to sort out the puzzle of being both an American and a Catholic. For example ...
  • "A renewed commitment to faithful citizenship can help heal the wounds of our nation, world, and Church. .... In times of terror and war, of global insecurity and economic uncertainty, of disrespect for human life and human dignity, we need to return to basic moral principles. Politics cannot be merely about ideological conflict, the search for partisan advantage, or political contributions. It should be about fundamental moral choices. How do we protect human life and dignity? How do we fairly share the blessings and burdens of the challenges we face? What kind of nation do we want to be? What kind of world do we want to shape?"

  • "Politics in this election year and beyond should be about an old idea with new power--the common good. The central question should not be, "Are you better off than you were four years ago?" It should be, "How can ‘we'--all of us, especially the weak and vulnerable--be better off in the years ahead? How can we protect and promote human life and dignity? How can we pursue greater justice and peace?"
  • "Every voice matters in the public forum. Every vote counts. Every act of responsible citizenship is an exercise of significant individual power."

11.03.2006

more beatitudinal synchronicity

I was literally flipping through a book of writings of our groovy founders looking for something and this bit from Mother Evangelista Gaffney jumped out at me...

Here then is Jesus' will - that I be poor in spirit, be meek, that I mourn when God is offended, that I hunger and thirst after justice, that I be merciful, that I be pure of heart, that I be a peace-maker and that I may suffer persecution for justice sake. Take these beatitudes, two and two, and I have the whole retreat in a nut shell.
-Mother Evangelista, Retreat Notes 1897

beatitudinal synchronicity

We started a new course at our intercommunity program this week. Actually we started two new courses - Personal Integration & Theology of the Vows. Both presenters will excellent and I think these 5 week courses will provide much food for thought and reflection.

Our homework for our Vows class was to look closely at the Vows Formula in our Constitutions - to memorize it in fact - and reflect on what words speak to us most dearly. So, I pulled out my copy of the groovy Constitutions and noticed this bit just before the Vow formula:

We commit ourselves to one another in community,
we signify our availability for service in mission,
and we express our willingness to become peacemakers
in the spirit of the beatitudes.


In the spirit of the beatitudes. I'd never noticed that before! I've been praying about the beatitudes and how to live them in my life ever since I started working on my All Saints' Day Reflection. And here it is in the section on vows in our constitutions. How willing am I to become a peacemaker in the spirit of the beatitudes. There's a lot packed into that ... good thing I've got almost 2 years before first vows!

11.02.2006

what is it they say?

What is it they say about not mixing religion and politics? Oh well ... politics is too ingrained in my blood. I was stuffing envelopes for my Dad's campaigns almost before I could walk. And I managed City elections for 8 years. So I give you blog quizzes in honor of it almost being the 1st Tuesday after the 1st Monday in November, also known as Election Day.

(These quizzes are totally biased and sterotyping by the way. The only reason I got 4% Republican is because I go to church on Sundays, and the Democrat questions were not the true measure of my political leanings. I am WAY more than 56% Democrat. But what do you expect from blog quizzes?)

You Are 4% Republican

If you have anything in common with the Republican party, it's by sheer chance.
You're a staunch liberal, and nothing is going to change that!


You Are 56% Democrat

You aren't a full fledged Democrat yet, but it's likely the party that fits you best.
You probably consider yourself an independent Democrat. You usually support the party, but you also think for yourself!

groovy history lesson

A commenter to a recent post asked me to share a bit about the history of the Congregation of the Sisters of St. Joseph of Peace (aka my “groovy sisters). Much of this is gleaned from our community website and a presentation my fellow Novices and I did at our Intercommunity Program.

Our story begins with our founder, Margaret Anna Cusack. I shared her story in detail a few weeks back. To sum up, she was a convert to Catholicism and a Poor Clare nun in Ireland for 25 years. In her convent, she was a prolific writer and ran her own publishing house. By 1870, more than 200,000 copies of her works had circulated throughout the world. Profits from the sale of books were used for the Poor Clare Sisters' work with the poor.

Over time, her focus shifted from writing histories to the plight of the Irish people during the famine of 1879. In particular her writing targeted people and institutions that she felt were contributing to the problem. Known as "The Nun of Kenmare," she became a symbol of liberation and simultaneously incurred the strong disapproval of Church and political leaders.

When her famine relief fund was forced to close, she decided it was time to leave Kenmare. She moved to Knock, Co. Mayo, with the idea of expanding the ministry of the Poor Clares to include a school for young women in the west of Ireland. Instead, she decided to found her own community, St Joseph’s Sisters of Peace of the Immaculate Conception.

Continued conflict in Knock with Church leaders led Margaret Anna to seek support in England. Under Cardinal Manning and Bishop Bagshawe, she received approbation for the new religious order from Pope Leo XIII and the Congregation of the Sisters of St. Joseph of Peace was founded in January, 1884, in the Diocese of Nottingham, England.

His Holiness Pope Leo XIII having granted me the extraordinary favour of a private audience on Friday, May 23, 1884 … His Holiness was pleased on this occasion to congratulate me on the favour which God had granted me on being the Foundress of a new religious order. He then said: ‘I bless you, I bless your order Sisters of Peace. God will bless and prosper it. I bless your Sisters present ant to come” and His Holiness more than once expressed his prediction of the prosperity of the order, and his blessing.” - Margaret Anna Cusack 1884

Later, Margaret Anna traveled to the United States to continue the education of immigrant Irish women but was immediately rebuked by Archbishop Corrigan of New York. Just at that time, New Jersey stretched out a hand of welcome and encouragement as Bishop Wigger of the Diocese of Newark invited her to establish homes for young Irish working women there. She claimed that because of Archbishop Corrigan's criticism of her among bishops throughout the United States, the work of her new community could not continue as long as she remained with them. Physically exhausted, sick and disillusioned with a patriarchal Church, Margaret Anna Cusack withdrew from the Sisters of St. Joseph of Peace and left behind the Sisters she so dearly loved. She eventually returned to England and her ecumenical affiliations. In later years, she kept in contact with the Sisters and expressed a loving concern for them. She died, June 5, 1899 and was buried in the cemetery reserved for the Church of England at Leamington, England.

Sister Evangelista Gaffney was elected to lead the new congregation in 1888. In 1891 St. Joseph Hospital, Bellingham, Washington was added to works already introduced in England and the United States.

Mother Evangelista and those who followed kept the community alive. Good works were started … hospitals, schools, missions in the Phillipines and Africa, the nation’s only school for the multi-impaired blind, and homes for orphans, the elderly and infirm. Their days were filled with much good work, as they lived out their maxim “Be kind to God’s poor and God’s priests.”

This was indeed a shift from Margaret Anna’s founding spirit of the “Sisters of Peace.” In fact, the name of the community had even changed to the Sisters of St Joseph of Newark. This shift was due in large part to the institutional church’s continued discomfort with our Foundress and her founding spirit. In fact, Sisters who entered the community prior to Vatican II were told that we were founded in 1888 by Mother Evangelista and Bishop Bagshawe. Margaret Anna was an unspoken secret in the closet of our history.

Like all Religious Communities, we were invited by the 2nd Vatican Council to rediscover the original spirit of our congregation. Beginning in 1967 our Sisters explored the new concept of “charism.” It wasn’t long before they found that the closets contained more than dusty boxes of mementos. From the corners of the past emerged the story of Margaret Anna. By 1970, we were able at a Special Chapter to reclaim our name of Sisters of St Joseph of Peace and to commission further study and research into our true past, history and founder.

In exploring and reconnecting with the true history and spirit of our founder Margaret Anna Cusack, our Sisters resonated with and began to embody in their religious life her desire to promote peace in our families, church and world.

Like most women religious, after Vatican II ministry options greatly expanded. No longer were you either a teacher or a nurse. Sisters became spiritual directors, peace & justice advocates, retreat leaders, and environmentalists. The question became not what you did, but how you did it in the pursuit of peace through justice.

Today, the Congregation of the Sisters of St Josephof Peace is an international Roman Catholic Congregation of about 300 Sisters living in the UK, the East Coast (mostly in New Jersey) and the West Coast (mostly the Seattle area but also in Oregon, Alaska, California & El Salvador). We also have a dynamic and very active group of lay associate members - both men & women.

Sisters & Associates pursue our mission of peacemaking in a variety of ways. We minister in health care, education, faith communities, social work, counseling, political advocacy, housing for women and children, retreat work, with persons living with AIDS, with Native Americans and immigrants. We are inspired by Margaret Anna’s words from our original 1884 Constitution:

The object of this Institute is, as its name implies, to promote the peace of the Church, both by word and work. The very name Sisters of Peace will, it is hoped, even of itself, inspire the desire for peace and a love for it.

11.01.2006

comfort and challenge

Sorry for the blog silence. I've been away at our intercommunity novitiate program the last two days. This week our community planned the 2 liturgies (we take turns). All went well. At our All Saint's Day liturgy today, I shared some reflections on the readings. It was interesting to find myself in a "preaching" capacity, especially as I think I need to hear this message as much as anyone. Nothing like the inner journey and living in community simultaneously to highlight (in neon letters it often seems) the areas where one needs to stretch. It's more like I was preaching to myself in a public forum! In any case, I thought I'd include my thoughts on this feast in light of today's readings for any that may be interested ....

Peace
Susan
---------------------------------------------
Almost two months ago we gathered together in this Chapel as a new community and heard Luke’s version of the Beatitudes. Today we hear the story again from Matthew’s perspective.

Fr. Mike shared with us our first week that in his experience, the Beatitudes are one of the most beloved Scripture passages of all time. Whenever parishioners have the opportunity to select readings for weddings or funerals, more often than not this is the Gospel passage chosen.

My own mother passed away three years ago last month. I was honored to plan her funeral mass, and yes I’ll admit it, this was indeed the Gospel reading I selected.

Why did I choose the Beatitudes? You can probably guess one of the reasons. It is kind of obvious …

“Blessed are they who mourn, for they will be comforted.”

Who doesn’t want to be blessed and comforted at one of the hardest moments of their lives?

The Beatitudes give comfort in distressing times. They express the hope and promise of a loving God. “Yes times may be tough, but stick with me and I’ll take care of you.”

It’s not really any surprise, then, that they are so popular. But I wonder … what if we heard more of the challenge implicit in Jesus’ words? Would they still be on the regular rotation?

Henri Nouwen writes that “Jesus is drawing a self-portrait here and inviting his disciples to become like him.”

Poor. Meek. Justice-Seeking. Merciful. Peace-making. This is the self-portrait Jesus draws for us. This is the model he is inviting us to mirror in our own lives and relationships.

Jesus not only draws this portrait, he embodies it in the Gospels. His actions speak louder than words, and they are accompanied by consequences that speak almost as loudly. Persecution. Insults. And more persecution. But the story, as we know, does not end there.

The path Jesus invites us to follow is not an easy one. Especially not if you take it seriously. But what can we really do, we’re only human after all.

And yet, we hear these words not only in our Lectionary readings, but we seek them out again and again. We may be actively seeking out the comfort, but we cannot help but hear the challenge.

In the challenge, we hear promise and hope, just as clearly as it is written on this banner (by the side of the altar.) Jesus invites us to seek the love of God above all else. Rejoice and be glad, for your reward will be great in heaven.

In the challenge, we are stretched to identify with people who have so much more to mourn that we do. With those who are victims of oppression and dire poverty in ways we can only imagine. With those whose life experiences make them truly meek and seekers of justice and makers of peace. In the challenge, we are called to journey with our brothers and sisters.

This journey may not be easy to embark upon day in and day out, but it is possible. All things are possible for God, even when the material God is working with is us silly human beings.

We gather together on All Saints Day. We remember real men and real women who were not only able to hear the challenge of Jesus. They were able to answer and live out his call, in their real human lives. That, in a way, is also a comfort. And a challenge.

A great multitude of men and women, from every nation, race, people, and tongue, were able not merely to survive times of great distress, but to live the good news. Not merely to survive, but to live the good news. If we look around the chapel here today, we will see may nations, races, peoples and tongues represented.

But again we might say, it’s all well and good for these HOLY men and women to live out the ideals of the Gospel. But we’re just ordinary people. What can we do?

I am reminded of what Dorothy Day once said to a reporter who remarked that he’d never interviewed a Saint before. She said, “Don't call me a saint -- I don't want to be dismissed that easily.”

We can dismiss ourselves too easily I think. We can dismiss our own abilities to live up to our God given potential.

It is true that we are only human. But so were the Saints. They started out on their journeys exactly as we have. The difference between them and the average Joe or Josephine is that they took the challenge of the Beatitudes very seriously. The beauty of it is, they are not only our role models, but journey with us and encourage us to live the good news with our lives.

Looking back, I think I selected the Beatitudes as the Gospel passage for my mother’s funeral not only to be comforted, but to be challenged. When a loved one dies, people often look back closely at their lives to see, what were the virtues they embodied? Is there something I could learn from their life?

This Feast of All Saints is an opportunity to ask ourselves, how serious are we about following their example and answering Jesus’ call?

Are we, as today’s Psalm says, the people who long to see God’s face? Perhaps Jesus is inviting us to see God’s face in each other, now, today. To be Christ to the stranger. To be Christ to our neighbor. To be saints in our every day lives.