Ten Years later... Remembering Mom

Mom with her daughters & two granddaughters

It's been ten years since my late night nap was interrupted by the phone call. Even before I answered the phone I knew ... Mom had passed on 3,000 miles and three time zones away.  She had been a real trouper through three years of some very serious and complex medical conditions.  Her suffering was deep and sustained, even as she faced it all with grace and graciousness.

It was honestly a relief to know that while we would be without her here on earth, her pain was over.  Ten years later of course, I still feel the pain of her loss.  Nothing prepares you to lose your mother.  Nothing.  It's such a part of the human experience, and yet it also creates such an empty space in your life.

Of course, my heart and memory are really not empty.  They are filled with memories of Mom, lessons she taught me long ago but that I am just starting to learn, and moments when I can't help but feel her presence.  That last one, feeling her presence, has happened pretty often lately, as I have been spending more time helping my Dad.  This summer I spent 17 straight hours in the emergency room and many days in the hospital with Dad.  Mom was there with me through it all, in memory, in spirit, in love.

Today on the tenth anniversary eve of Mom's passing, her dear friend Bev passed away after her long journey with cancer.  I am sure that Mom and Bev are having a grand reunion in whatever space is on the other side.  I'm also sure that Mom and Bev are also keeping their eyes on Bev's daughters as they begin their journey without their Mom.  I'm holding them especially in prayer these days.

Ten years later, I still miss my Mom.  But I am also filled with deep gratitude for her love and the gift of her life.

Peace to all those who are missing loved ones.