5.09.2006

today's d'oh! moment

In my last post, I wrote about how I've often described myself as an East Coast "refugee" and hence find myself not terribly excited about the novitiate being in New Jersey:

I feel much more "me" out west. Of course I'm supposed to be continuing the journey from "me" to "we." I've got lots of room for personal growth on this journey, that's for sure!
Today at mass it dawned on me how much depth and power is in that little realization. Me being me, I am the type that God sometimes has to drag kicking and screaming to new things. Hence it took me a good 6 months of journaling to even admit to myself that there were some obvious signs that I should at least consider the possibility I had a religious vocation. Heck, it took me 3 months of going to Church every Sunday for some unkown reason to even admit to myself that I was Catholic again!!

I've been less than enthusiastic that this wonderful vocation journey of mine to groovy sisterhood is taking me for a time to the east coast. Mostly because I swore when I left 16 years ago that I was not living there ever again. Which I guess is why "they" say to never say never. Especially where God is concerned because God in my experience has a wicked sense of humor.

But back to my realization … yes I may not feel very much like me on the east coast. But this journey is not about me. Yes I'm a key player, but God is calling me to much more. God has gifted me with an amazing community of groovy women religious. God has gifted me with a passion for peace and justice and a desire to use my gifts to help those who need it most. God has gifted me with the miraculous dissapearance of many thousands of dollars worth of debt to speed up this whole process.

Not only am I moving from my story to being a part of the larger groovy sister story, but God is travelling with me on this journey. It's ok if I don't feel like me back east, because I'm being called and transformed into a new me/we anyway.

One of those d'oh! moments to be sure … and worth some further reflection.

All will be well. All manner of things shall be well.

1 comment:

~m2~ said...

(((susan)))

just wait until your first bite of a Jersey tomato...or handful of fat Jersey blues.

methinks you'll eventually be happy here, even if only for the produce :)