Perspective

This month I'm attending the Summer Institute of the National Religious Vocation Conference, otherwise known as "Vocation Director School."  This is in preparation for moving into vocation ministry next year when I finish my degree.  I believe with all my heart in the future of religious life and my own community, and I suspect that God is indeed calling women to join us in our mission of peace. This course is to give me some of the nuts and bolts around how you actually promote vocations and work with candidates.

The last few days we've been focused on the application and screening process. I've had flashbacks to my own experience of completing the application for candidacy to my community, which of course is documented on this blog. My reaction from the way back machine? "Whew! Guess this would winnow out those who weren’t so serious."

Seriously. This is important stuff. You want to make sure that the people who join your community are able to live the life as a Sister fully ... for life. That requires a certain level of screening and assessment which is more than understandable. However, if I thought the process seemed daunting from the side of the applicant, looking at it from the side of the Vocation Director can be just as daunting!

Which is where today's readings come in. As I prayed with the Scripture this morning, I found myself reflecting both on the the first reading and the Gospel.

From Isaiah: 

O LORD, you mete out peace to us,for it is you who have accomplished all we have done.

From Matthew's Gospel:

“Come to me, all you who labor and are burdened,and I will give you rest.Take my yoke upon you and learn from me,for I am meek and humble of heart;and you will find rest for yourselves.For my yoke is easy, and my burden light.”

The take away? Perspective. And trust. As we say in our CSJP Constitutions:

As we live our vows each daywe trust that Christ's blessing promisedto peacemakers will sustain us,knowing that God working in uswill accomplish more than we can askor imagine.

My task these weeks is to soak up as much information as I can that will help me when I move into this ministry. I will also learn from the current vocation director (who was my own awesome vocation director by the way!) as I develop my own plan for this ministry. I will work with the other Sisters on the vocation team, leadership, and the whole community. We all share in our love of community and desire to continue to release the charism. Ultimately, then, my/our role is to show up and follow Jesus, trusting that God working in us will accomplish what needs to be done, even that which we cannot yet imagine.

Shining the Lights

Many moons ago, in the early days of this blog, I wrote a little post about the application process for entering the formation process with the Sisters. And, as part of that process, I visited a priest psychologist at a local parish (who happened to be an internationally recognized expert) who did a behavioral assessment for the benefit of the community I hoped to join.

And, after the 3 hours spent answering intimate and personal questions, I went outside to my car to drive the hour and a half back home, and .... my car battery had died.  It had been foggy when I had arrived on windy country roads and I'd left my lights on. I had to take a deep breath, suck in my pride, and head back inside to find someone to help me. As it happened, I wandered the halls of the parish until I found the same priest psychologist who found the parish maintenance man (on his lunch) who helped me jump my car.

Well .... today I will have the opportunity to "look behind the hood" of the process! To shine the lights on how the questions he asked are relevant to the potential to life religious life.

Because you see ... I'm starting a workshop with the SAME priest psychologist on how to do a behavioral assessment with candidates for religious life.

Funny the paths life takes!

Flowers in the Window

I was reminded in prayer this morning of this quote from the founder of my religious community, Margaret Anna Cusack (known in religion as Mother Francis Clare):

For as you know, the religious orders in the Church of God are like the flowers in a garden each has its own use, its own duty, its own special perfume and is own beauty. All are good because all have the Divine sanction. All are useful because each has is own special work. Hence let us love and care for all as far as it is in our power to do so and let us rejoice in their joys and sorrow in their griefs. - Margaret Anna Cusack, General Letter to the Congregation, April 1887

Really, my ENTIRE religious life has been spent both in the "garden of my community," and in the context of the larger "flower garden of religious life." One gift of this time of demographic change in religious life is that I have journeyed with women and men religious from a whole variety of congregations since the very beginning. It started with my religious formation and experience of intercongregational novitiate and has continued with Giving Voice and now my studies here at CTU. The newest generations of religious are inherently connected across congregations. I can't help but think that this is a work of the Spirit.

Yesterday I was privileged to spend the day with new and more seasoned vocation directors from multiple religious congregations to learn together about ethical issues in vocation ministry. In fact, I'll be spending time in this mixed religious life flower garden for the next two weeks!

Because of this time in religious life I just described, I already knew a handful of people in the group. I have friends in common with others. And even though some are new, they will be added to my religious life network by the end of the two weeks. What gift!

After praying with the quote from Margaret Anna, I was reminded of this song by the Scottish indie pop band Travis, "Flowers in the Window."

 

I you just read the lyrics, you'll see why this is a perfect song to pray in gratitude for this time of connection and cross pollination in religious life!

wow look at you now
flowers in the window
it's such a lovely day
and i'm glad you feel the same
cos to stand up
out in the crowd
you are one in a million
and i love you so let's watch the flowers grow
there is no reason to feel bad
but there are many seasons to feel sad glad mad
it's just a bunch of feelings that we have to hold
but i am here to help you with the load
wow look at you now
flowers in the window
it's such a lovely day and i'm glad you feel the same
cos to stand up
out in the crowd
you are one in a million
and i love you so let's watch the flowers grow

Harvest Time?

In today's Gospel passage from Matthew, Jesus says to his disciples (and to us): "The harvest is abundant but the laborers are few; so ask the master of the harvest to send out laborers for his harvest."

How fitting that this is today's reading! Because, you see, I about to embark on a new adventure. For the next two weeks I will be attending the Summer Institute of the National Religious Vocation Conference, conveniently located in Chicago. In my own head, I call this "Vocation Director School."  I joined our CSJP vocation team earlier this year and am planning to transition more fully into this ministry after graduation. I am looking forward to being immersed in many of the issues and learning skills and gaining resources for this new adventure.

In our CSJP Constitutions we say that:

Our founding spirit calls us
to further the work of peace. ...
In accord with our tradition
we commit ourselves to promote peace
in family life, in the church, and in society.
We strive to respect the dignity of all persons,
to value the gifts of creation,
and to confront oppressive situations.
We respond to God's people in need
and promote social justice
as a way to peace. ...
Confident of God's faithful love
and collaborating with others who work for
justice and peace,
we face the future with gratitude and hope.

We also quote this other Scripture passage in our Constitutions:

True justice
is the harvest
reaped by peacemakers
from seeds sown
in a spirit of peace. (James 3:18)

Given the current state of the world, it certainly seems that there is a lot of work to be done! I have a great deal of energy and excitement about our future as a community seeking peace through justice. I know in my heart that God is calling us into the future, and that others will join us on the journey as peacemakers and harvesters.  I am excited about the opportunity to be part of our vocation team which both seeks out these "brave, noble, large-minded, courageous souls." as our founder put it, and invites them to consider the wonderfully crazy life of a CSJP!

Milestones and a new adventure

It is hard to believe that is almost 2 years since I arrived in Chicago to study at Catholic Theological Union! I finished my coursework for my Masters of Arts Degree in Theology (major in Ethics, minor in Spirituality) last semester.  This summer I have been busy reviewing my research, papers and notes to draft the questions that will be the basis for my oral comprehensive exams in November.

I met with my advisor last week to review my first draft of questions, and just e-mailed off a revised set to my board for approval, which I hope are close to the final product.  Next step is to develop outlines and study guides!

Preparing the questions really was a meaningful process. I learned a lot in the effort, in no small part because turning my ethics papers into comps questions involved a bit of re-engineering.  Typically, my papers involve substantial research and social analysis into a topic or issue to which I then apply insights and methods from theological ethics.  However, because the purpose of the exam is not to show how much I learned about climate change, human trafficking, racism, or the feminization of migration, but rather to prove my knowledge, grasp, and facility with theological ethics, I had to flip everything on its head.  In the process, I surprised myself about how much I understand now about the Catholic moral tradition. Which of course is the point of the degree!

My advisor encouraged me to go ahead and draft outlines now for the questions, while I still have this depth of knowledge on the forefront of my brain. So now that the questions are finished, that's my plan for the next two days.

Then on Tuesday I switch gears and attend the Summer Institute for the National Religious Vocation Conference. Yes, in the mix of whatever else is up next for me in my life and ministry as a Sister of St. Joseph of Peace, I am excited that vocation ministry will be part of that mix. And I am grateful that my community is sending me to this series of workshops so that I can gain the knowledge I need!

Introducing ... National Catholic Sisters Week

Today is International Women's Day. It also happens to be the first day of the Inaugural National Catholic Sisters Week (March 8-14)! As a woman and a Catholic Sister I am happily celebrating both and invite you to do the same.

There are National Catholic Sisters Week events happening in certain parts of the country (like my young friends Sister Julia Walsh and Sister Julie Viera appearing on a special "Sisters Stories" event in collaboration with the awesome people at the Moth Radio hour - it will be live streamed today at 3PM Eastern).

The internet is also the place to be if you think #nunsrock, with websites and Facebook and Twitter happenings galore.

• Official National Catholic Sisters Week Facebook page
• Sister Story website and Facebook page
• A Nun's Life has lots of National Catholic Sisters Week action 
• There's a NCSW page on Pinterest
• National Catholic Sisters Week is on Twitter @NCSWeek

If you are on Twitter, enjoy the fun with these hashtags: #NCSW, #NationalCatholicSistersWeek, #CatholicSisters, and my personal favorite, #nunsrock.

The Facebook and Twitter (@SistersofPeace) pages of my own groovy Sisters of St. Joseph of Peace will also have special posts for National Catholic Sisters Week each day. Be sure to check them out!

Unexpected Joy ... Remembering the Joy of My Call to Religious Life

There's an article in NCR about the Papal letter to religious issued in anticipation of 2015, the Year of Consecrated Life. The letter is titled "Rejoice!" but is only in Italian so far so I've not read it, but I did read this in the NCR article:

Preparing for the Year for Consecrated Life, members of religious orders, secular institutes and consecrated virgins are asked to spend a considerable amount of time remembering the joy they felt when they first realized God was calling them.

"Pope Francis has asked us to let our hearts dwell on a freeze-frame of the joy of 'the moment when Jesus looked at me,'" said Cardinal Joao Braz de Aviz and Archbishop Jose Rodriguez Carballo, respectively prefect and secretary of the Congregation for Institutes of Consecrated Life and Societies of Apostolic Life.

When I read this article on my smartphone on the bus on the way to visit my Dad, I immediately flashed back to my moment of unexpected joy, which took place in a very unexpected place ... the women's bathroom on the 1st floor of the Portland City Hall (2nd window to the right of the rotunda on the 1st floor!).

Can't quite picture it? I can't blame you. It's an odd spot for such a moment. But luckily I already shared the moment on the way back machine that is this blog in a post from the days of my discernment entitled "Unexpected Joy." I wrote this when I was applying for candidacy with my now community:

There comes a point in Harry Potter when Harry needs to remember a moment when he was truly happy in order to fend off some foul creatures that want to eat his soul. His first memories weren't strong enough - they were the run of the mill happy. In the end he needed to find a truly joyous moment.

This all got me thinking about a moment when I was very unexpectedly filled with joy. It was back when I was first beginning to stop actively ignoring this tug I was feeling in my heart. I'd starting talking to my pastor about the direction my life was going and where God was calling me. I'd been dancing around the realization that all signs were pointing to religious life. As I think I've written here before, I wasn't too terribly excited about the idea intellectually. But then the joy hit me. In the bathroom at work of all places. I remember looking in the mirror, washing my hands, filled with joy at the wondrous possibility that I could become a Sister. I could use my gifts to serve God and help transform the world. I was literally bursting with joy. I wanted to tell the whole world. Instead I was a good bureaucrat and went back to my desk to what seemed even more like drudgery in comparison to the joyous possibilities that lay ahead for me to explore.

I've got the last part of my groovy sister application coming up on Wednesday - the dreaded psychological evaluation. It'll be fine I know but I am of course somewhat nervous. But, like Harry, I'm planning to hold on to the memory of this joyous moment in the bathroom to see me through.

Of course, little did I know there's a bit of drudgery in every life, even when it's your calling. But the joy is still there, bubbling up sometimes more than others, but always present, especially when I am with my Sisters or working for peace through justice or using my talents and gifts in little ways to serve God and help transform the world. And that, my friends, is pure gift!

Giving Voice to the Importance of Peers

Me with some of my GV Sisters at our
2013 National Conference

Regular readers of the blog know that I am involved with (and presently on the leadership team of) Giving Voice, a grassroots peer-led network of younger women religious that creates spaces for younger women religious to give voice to their hopes, dreams, and challenges in religious life.

Having a peer group is something that many of us take for granted in our lives. We grow up with the kids in our neighborhood and/or our classmates in school. In college we bond with age peers with similar interests as we explore new territory and learn by making mistakes. Young married couples with small children often find that they have more in common with the parents of their children's friends than with friends going through different stages of life.  We naturally seek, and developmentally we need, peers with whom we can journey through the ups and downs of life.

In religious life, our elder Sisters in community have always had a large ready made group of age peers to share ministry, prayer, and community life. They have grown up together and are growing old together. While the large group they entered with at 21 has certainly dwindled over the years, as they swam through the choppy waters after Vatican II and aged gracefully, they still share community with a sizable group of women within 5 to 15 years of their own age.

This reality is vastly different for younger women entering religious life today.  Often we are the only younger women, or one of a small group of younger members, in our particular community.  As our elders Sisters retire or move into active prayer ministry, we are just beginning our ministries or seeking to apply our energy to new endeavors.  As our elder Sisters look at leadership and community decisions with more years of religious life lived than on the horizon, we seek to find ways to bring our vital charisms to a needy world with smaller numbers and a very changed society over a longer horizon with many unknowns ahead. 

This also leads to a unique situation in community life. On the one hand, on a daily basis we navigate an unusual dance where women 20, 30, 40, or even 50 years older than ourselves are the women with whom we share prayer, community life, and sometimes ministry. As a result, even though we are by no means their age peers, in many ways as community members we relate as peers. Truth be told this is one of the unexpected gifts of religious life in the early 21st Century, which has become a laboratory for intergenerational and intercultural community living.  I have dear friends in community who are 75 or 84 or even 90. As I've been in the community longer, my treasure chest of shared experiences, in-jokes, and deep love is filled all the more. In many ways, I wouldn't trade this intergenerational experience for a large group of age peers in community. 

On the other hand, there is no denying that it is vitally important to have age peers in religious life as well.  Try as they might, my single or married friends outside community just cannot understand how funny x or y is that happens in community or why even though it makes absolutely no sense not only do I have to z, I really want to.  And try as they might, my elder Sisters in community just cannot understand what it is like to be part of such a small age minority at this transformational time in American religious life.

Luckily, I have always had women within 10 years of my age in community, albeit a small group. Since my novitiate classmate Chero and I entered almost 10 years ago 5 more women have entered. This is a gift.

Another gift has been my network of Giving Voice friends across congregations. I attended my first Giving Voice gathering, a retreat for Sisters in their 20s & 30s, during my novitiate.  I cannot tell you how much that retreat meant to me at that point. Oh wait, actually I already did, in a blog post way back in 2008:

In addition to our times for prayer, play, and more play, we also had some deep conversations about our lives and this larger religious life experience. It helped to have other voices expressing similar thoughts. I left feeling much stronger and part of something bigger. Religious life may be different, it may be smaller, but it will continue. These women are passionate about their communities, passionate about their ministries, and passionate about religious life. God is in the mix, and all shall be well.

In the years since, my Giving Voice peers have been an integral part of my own growth and development as a woman religious in the 21st Century.  We laugh, cry, play, and dream together, across the miles. Another amazing gift of this unique time in religious life is the opportunity to experience so many different charims mixing and mingling.  After every Giving Voice experience, whether it is a conference or a retreat or a conference call, I find myself amazed at the power of the Spirit moving through history.

Our Giving Voice network continues to grow, deepen, and develop with exciting opportunities on the horizon.  I can see more and more how my life as a Sister of St. Joseph of Peace will be strengthened and supported  by my Giving Voice peers across congregational lines well into our shared, if unknown, future. When I dream and pray about the future of religious life, I know what I knew at that first retreat as a novice. My Giving Voice sisters and their passion for God, life, religious life, and their own communities will help create that future even as we live it now. God is in the mix, and all shall be well.

I've aged out of the 20s/30s retreat, but it continues! In fact, there's a great article in the Catholic Sun (Phoenix Diocesan paper) that just came out. If you want some positive energy, do yourself a favor and click the link to read the article.

As for me, I continue to be energized and find great hope in my work on the Giving Voice Core Team. And this summer, I will be part of creating a new chapter in our shared history as I help to host our first Giving Voice retreat for Sisters in their 40s! God, my friends, is very good. And so is having peers.

Religious Life Today and Into the Future

Illustration from the America article.
For the record, I own one of these t-shirts.

My friend Sister Julia Walsh, FSPA has an amazing article in the current issue of America Magazine titled "Changed, Not Ended: A View of Religious Life from a Young Sister." I know Julia through Giving Voice, a group regular readers of the blog should be very familiar with. Giving Voice is a network of younger women religious, an opportunity for us to connect across congregations with our religious life age peers, to pray, reflect, have fun, and share our hopes, dreams, desires and experiences of this amazing yet counter-cultural way of life.

For the past few years, I have been honored to be part of the peer-leadership of Giving Voice. This has given me a real bird's eye view into the landscape of religious life, particularly as viewed from the horizon of younger women who have entered in the past 10-15 years.

While Julia is clear that she is writing from her own perspective, I must say that I resonate with so much of what she writes in this peace. For example:

About Giving Voice

• "Hope is obvious at [every Giving Voice] gathering. "
• "The collaboration and connections made possible through Giving Voice help us to keep saying yes to our vocations."

About living religious life today as a younger Sister

• "I appreciate my experience as it is."
• "This experience, of course, does have its challenges. As modern religious life—and its size—evolves, even the most hopeful and eager need to deal with practical consequences of transition. For me, the hardest element of the quickly shrinking population of my community is the regularity of death announcements."
• "I love being a sister because I am permitted to be the best version of myself within a community of like-minded, prayerful women."
• "The religious vows, prophetic in nature, free me to move to the edges and encounter God in new realms. This vocation creates opportunities to live a life of radical simplicity, solidarity and accompaniment with those who are oppressed."
• "Being a sister has warped my perception of age. Even though I am [41 - Julia is] 32, I feel as if anyone under 60 is my peer. That said, my experience of intergenerational communal living is energizing. I gain wisdom from my elder sisters; I am enriched by what they have lived through. I am humbled to know we young sisters are receiving their legacy."

About the future of religious life

• "Some people, focused almost exclusively on numbers, are concerned that religious life is in decline. This narrows our ability to see what God is doing."
• "Religious life is not in decline; it is simply changing. And it should change. New paradigms of religious life can emerge only if we are open to God changing us beyond our limited imagining and dreaming. We need to remember that numbers do not make communities. In fact, I prefer to be part of a community that feels more like a family than an institution. The freer and more open we are, the better we can live the Gospel according to God’s vision and not our own ideas. We can experience the freedom to have meaningful conversations about “right-sizing” and new forms of ministry. We acknowledge it can be life-giving for the size of community to decrease; lower numbers can open up new opportunities for healthy, intimate relationships." [I LOVE this entire paragraph and will be borrowing the term 'right-sizing']
• "I am not worried about changes in religious life; I am excited. I trust that God is up to something amazingly good. I believe that God is helping religious life evolve to meet the changing needs of society. "

And I LOVE and affirm her last sentence: "Thank God, by grace, we are in this together."

Thank you Julia for articulating so well what religious life looks like from the horizon of those in our 20s, 30s, or 40s.  

For any of you reading this who might be thinking that maybe possibly God might be calling you to this wonderful crazy life ... come on in, the water's fine! Seriously though, if anyone has any vocation or religious life related questions, my email box is always open. The address is in the side bar.

I may not know what the future of religious life will look like, but I know there are incredible needs in our world, powerful and prayerful women on the journey, and a loving God who is calling us into the future. Trust. Love. Risk. Live. Together!

Margaret Anna Fridays

Most Fridays I am going to share some words of wisdom from the founder of my religious community, Margaret Anna Cusack, known in religion as Mother Francis Clare.

We are beginning a new Order. We want brave, noble, large-minded, courageous souls, and six such souls are of far more value than sixty selfish, self-seeking novices whose first idea is for themselves, and whose second idea is for themselves, and whose third and fourth and fifth idea is for themselves, and who let God and good of souls come in last in a heavy hearted way. 

(Mother Francis Clare to the new community, 1887)

Interestingly and perhaps not surprisingly, we usually only quote the first bit! 

7 Years Ago Yesterday

Late August must be a popular time for entering religious communities or making vows.  My Facebook feed has been full of young nun friends marking their anniversary dates.  This made me pause and look back at the way back machine that is this blog.  Guess what! It turns out that yesterday was 7 years since I was received as a novice and became "Sister Susan."

Here's a walk down memory lane from that auspicious day!

Well folks, it was an amazing day. I'm a bit at a loss for words so I'll use pictures to tell the story... We gathered in our Chapel at St. Mary-on-the-lake. Our sister Novice  had been received earlier in the day in New Jersey. Chero & I were received by our own groovy province out west. We shared our hopes for the novitiate ...We got our Peace Crosses (our symbol of identity with the congregation)...
We received our own copies of our Constitutions (so I can now return my long borrowed copy) ...
In addition to the many groovy sisters and associates in attendance, I had my own cheering section. Here's Kim &  Jackie taking pictures ... My friends Sr. Pat & Sr. Sharon from my parish also came as a surprise! ...
I cried a lot ... happy tears. I'm a poignant moment crier, and today was a special day in my life. Alexandra gave an amazing reflection - a letter from our foundress Margaret Anna Cusack to the new novices. That started my tears of joy and gratitude rolling ...
The new novices .... notice our Peace Crosses! (and accidentally color coordinated outfits).
There was a party after in the dining room. Lots of visiting, treats and fun. Afterwards Jackie, Kim & I went back to my house. I'm spending the next week and a half (until I fly to New Jersey to enter the Congregational Novitiate) living with the sisters I spent my groovy sister reserves with this past year. We went to Saturday vigil mass, had a yummy bbq dinner on the deck, and then I opened my cards and gifts. A good day, even if I have some adjusting to do to this ...
Mostly I'm deeply happy and grateful to God for this invitation and the whatever it took to finally say yes. Not to mention this amazing community of friends I have found to journey with. Wow .... But for now, BED!!

Collage

I spent the bulk of this thunderstormy Chicago day cleaning and reorganizing my room.  One of my neighbors moved away recently and I appropriated a large Ikea bookcase she left behind which fits PERFECTLY and helps to make my little space here in the CTU dorm look a bit more organized (and a bit less junky).

I also decided to finally do something with the blank wall above my bed.  There's a rather annoying, if necessary, pipe/cord down the middle that is attached to the smoke detector.  That's part of why I never put anything up.  Plus while I kept much of my pre-convent life artwork (to better decorate the community houses where I usually live!), I left it all in storage in Seattle.

In resourceful grad school style, I decided to make a collage of some 8X10 prints of some of my favorite photos, taken by yours truly on retreat and journeys in recent years.

I'm pretty happy with the effect, even with the pipe/cord thing breaking up the 2nd and 3rd columns!  For one thing the greens, blues and browns match the colors of my bed spread and assorted dorm furniture. More importantly, however, I realized that the photos I chose speak to my spirituality, my vocation, and my relationship with God, creation, and self.

On the top left you have a photo taken through the chapel window at our CSJP retreat house on the Jersey Shore.  The standing cross from the chapel is almost lined up with the cross in the window pane with the Atlantic in the background. This picture always reminds me, as our CSJP Constitutions say, that Christ is our peace, the source of our power.

The next photo on the top row is from another ocean.  It took this last year on retreat on the Oregon Coast.  This photo speaks to me of the joy, laughter, and playfulness of our Creator God.

The last photo on that row, and the first on the next row, I believe are photos I took of stones near the koi pond at our Jersey Shore retreat house.  I love the perspective of the photos, as if hope and dreaming are hanging on despite their better judgement and gravity!  Which, in my experience, is not too far from reality.  To dream that we can help make the world a better place and to hope despite all the evidence to the contrary is part of the life of faith.  It is part of the human experience.  And again, in my experience, it is really only possible in a sustained manner in the context of community.

Which leads to the next photo of the street signs.  No, these are not photoshopped!  Last spring I was giving a presentation in Central Washington and took a chance to explore around Wenatchee where our CSJP Sisters ministered for many years in health care and education.  I drove by the school that we started which is still home to today's generation of students and teachers.  I got out to take a better look, and realized that I had parked my car across the street at the corner of Susan Street and St. Joseph Place!  This picture again reminds me of God's playfulness and the miracle that I someway found my way through all the noise to this life as a Sister of St. Joseph of Peace.

The last photo is from this past summer.  My college friend Kathy and I spent an afternoon walking in Muir Woods.  I realized many years ago that forests and trees are very important to me spiritually.  They are where I am most calm, at peace, centered.  Redwoods, cedars, and other trees found on the west coast tend to be rather large.  They also tend to be kind of old, and yet still they stand, having witnessed generation after generation of humans, still reaching up and up and up.  In this collage, I love how the trees of Muir Woods are reaching up towards my dreams. And given that this collage is above my bed, my own dreams will reach up through the trees!

All in all, I'm quite pleased with the finished product.  It feels like one year after I arrived here, this space is now closer to complete.  It is certainly not home--my recent visit to west coast groovy sister hq regrounded me in how important my csjp home is to me--but it is certainly a hospitable and cozy space in which to continue my studies in the coming school year!

9 years later ... my proper place

Next month marks nine years since I first drove onto the property here at St. Mary-on-the-Lake for a vocation retreat.  A few months earlier, I had finally woken up to the possibility that perhaps, possibly, maybe my desire might best meet God's desire as a Catholic Sister.  That initial wake up call would never have happened were it not for an simple email from my pastor that helped me name my deep desire to serve God and promote social justice as a path to peace.  I started meeting with a spiritual director and explored the possibilities of religious life, all the while sure that I would NEVER find a religious community where I would belong and be able to answer God's call.

Then, almost nine years ago, after searching the internet and finding the Sisters of St. Joseph of Peace, I accepted an invitation from Sr. Jo-Anne to drive up to Bellevue and attend a vocation retreat.  Since I was driving from Portland, I asked if I could stay overnight.  I was nervous.  Even though I'd attended 12 years of Catholic School, this would be my first time staying with Sisters.  I had lots of nervous energies and wonderings about what it would be like.  And then I drove onto the campus of St. Mary-on-the-Lake, our regional center in the Pacific Northwest.  I had a mix cd in the car stereo (this was 2004 and pre-MP3).  Literally as I turned down the drive into our forested campus, this song by Voice of the Beehive started to play:


"Jesus, Jesus, help me find my proper place."

No joke.  Unplanned.  And yet, he did. Nine years later I am finally professed as a Sister of St. Joseph of Peace.  This is home.  These women are in my heart.  I carry them with me when I am in studying in Chicago.  I carry them with me when I am helping to organize a conference of younger Sisters from congregations across the country.  I carry them with me when I am sitting by my father in the emergency room.  Somehow, through the grace of God I was able to stop, listen, and discover that place, both physical and not, where I am able to be my best self for the glory of God and to serve God's people in need ... as a Sister of St. Joseph of Peace.

Tomorrow I head back to Chicago to finish up some of my summer projects, head to another meeting, a week of vacation, and then start back up with school.  Today I will visit with a few more Sisters and soak in more of the peace that is this sacred space at St. Mary-on-the-Lake.  I might be leaving, but I carry this gift of community with me, and for that I am so very very grateful!

Young Nun Gathering

Our Giving Voice National gathering is just two days away!  We've already got some press from Catholic San Francisco, the diocesan news service in the Bay Area!

Young sisters to gather in Bay Area for national convention
July 3rd, 2013
Under-50 Catholic sisters will gather at Notre Dame de Namur University in Belmont July 5-8 for the Giving Voice National Gathering. The sisters, most of whom are the youngest members of their religious orders, will pray and reflect on the future of mission and ministry in the church and society in the 21st century. Sister Yolanda Tarango, congregation leader of the Sisters of Charity of the Incarnate Word and a renowned theologian, will share her insights on the conference theme of “Mission and Ministry in the 21st Century.” 

The four-day national gathering will bring together vowed women religious from across North America representing more than 30 religious orders. Participants will pray, reflect and creatively imagine what the future ministry of Catholic sisters might look like given the growing number of people living in poverty or on the margins on society as well as the increasing intercultural reality. The sisters themselves represent this intercultural reality, and simultaneous translation will allow English- and Spanish-speaking participants to share in their own language. 

Religious life is in the midst of an historic shift, as the large novitiate classes of the 1950s and 1960s age and fewer women enter religious life today. On July 8, the sisters will participate in an outdoor interactive exercise to imagine “going on a mission” in smaller numbers in the future. 

Giving Voice is a peer-led grassroots national organization of Catholic sisters under the age of 50 that creates spaces for younger women religious to give voice to their hopes, dreams and challenges in religious life. The July conference is the seventh national gathering of younger women religious organized since 1997 and the first to take place on the West Coast. Previous gatherings have taken place in Boston, Chicago, Cleveland and Milwaukee.
For more information, visit www.giving-voice.org. 

From July 5, 2013 issue of Catholic San Francisco.
- See more at: http://www.catholic-sf.org/ns.php?newsid=27&id=61576#sthash.2Dwfakgz.dpuf

By the way, we will be blogging a bit from the conference.  Follow along on our Giving Voice 2013 blog!

Companions

I am blessed to be spending this week in London with our Congregation novitiate community. We are working together on a project and in the process getting to know each other better.

It is amazing to me how God works in our lives and in our community. I clearly remember, when I first considered religious life in general and the CSJP community in particular, being concerned about the reality of diminishment and lack of vocations. How could I join my lot with this group? Yes thry are amazing women. But who would be my companions 15, 25, 50 years down the line?

Yet my heart was already caught up in love for the CSJP charism and community, and so I took the plunge. As luck (or God) would have it, I ended up entering with a group. Four of us made first vows within a few years of each other and now we have a new group of three in the novitiate discerning their call as Sisters of St Joseph of Peace.

It is an honor to hear their stories, both their lives until now and their first connection with our community. Like myself, each of them first connected with us via our website and then fell in love with our Sisters. The charism is very strong in the three of them in very unique ways. I am filled with gratitude and hope.

Please join me in praying for my new companions on their novitiate journey. And pray too for all women and men discerning a call to the crazy wonderful experiment that is religious life.

Vocations Prayer - Sowing the Seeds of Peace

Today is the World Day of Prayer for Vocations.

On this day, I pray in deep awe, wonder and gratitude to my good, gracious, and creative God who managed to break through and lead me to finding my heart and mission in the Sisters of St. Joseph of Peace.

On this day, I pray in love, friendship and appreciation for the amazing women (pictured below) who have entered the Sisters of St. Joseph of Peace either with me or in the years since.  While I may not know what the future will hold for our world, Church or religious community, I know that I will be walking in the way of peace with these women.

On this day, I pray in hope and solidarity with and for young women who are considering that maybe, just maybe, God might be calling them to religious life.  As I ponder the future of religious life and my congregation, I return again and again to these words from Margaret Anna Cusack, known in religious life as Mother Francis Clare, the founder of the Sisters of St. Joseph of Peace.  She said:  "We are beginning a new order.  We want brave, noble, large-minded, courageous souls." Indeed.  These words are just as true today as when she first wrote them.

I also find myself reflecting on the words of Bishop Edward Bagshawe at the first profession of Sisters of St. Joseph of Peace in Nottingham England in 1884:  "You will hope, if God blesses your work, to sow the seeds of peace in modern society."

Please join me in praying for our three Novices (Sisters Juliana, Katrina, and Sheena) and our two temporary professed Sisters (Dorothy and Sukyi) as they continue to put down roots and nourish their connections to this mission of peace.  Please pray too for new vocations to help us continue to sow the seeds of peace in a post-modern society that is deeply in need of peace.

God of peace, thank you for your gift of peace and the mission entrusted to the Sisters of St. Joseph of Peace to promote peace in family life, in the church and in society.  We humbly pray that you nurture the seeds of this charism in the hearts of young women who might be called to vowed membership in our congregation.  May we grow together in love to embody these words from our original Constitutions.   "The very name Sisters of Peace will, it is hoped, inspire the desire of peace and a love for it." Amen.

An invitation to come and see

I've got an invitation for those of you:

• Who live within driving distance of Seattle
• Have ever considered or are possibly thinking about religious life as a possibility for you
• Have wanted to see Sisters in their natural habitat ;)
• Would like to know more about younger women religious today

If you are a young woman between the ages of 20-40 who fits some of those categories, why not consider attending the upcoming Come & See Gathering being organized by the Sisters of St. Joseph of Peace.  I won't be there, but it will be happening at my old house and I guarantee you will love getting to know Sisters Chero, Dorothy and Charlotte who live there now. I'll copy the flyer below which has more details like the date and RSVP info.  Who knows .... you might find where God is calling you!

USCCB Blog Post

I was invited to tell my vocation story for a post on the US Bishop's Conference Blog for National Vocation Awareness Week.  They are having different younger religious and priests tell their story on the blog this week.  Today my story is posted.

Happy Vocation Awareness Week!

I have come to love the look of awakening awareness when someone realizes for the first time that I am a Catholic Sister.  They are usually surprised, although this varies depending on their background and awareness of Catholicism and religious life. They usually start to say something and then stop.  Then they sometimes lick their lips or blink.  Finally they lean forward and generally say one of the following:

1) Like a nun?

2) Are you a real Sister?

3) Wow. Really?

4) or continued silence.

Here is a blog post from a heavy ministry day a while back where I had a number of these interactions, including the 8th grade boy who simply said "Woah!"

My general response is that I am a Sister of St. Joseph of Peace. Depending on their level of interest I tell them a bit about our charism and how I make so much more sense being me in the context of community as I try to integrate my life of prayer and my ministry in service of God and God's people.

Here on the blog, of course, this isn't an issue.  If you are reading the blog, my guess is you know I am a Sister.  Yes I am a "real" Sister, having professed perpetual vows of poverty, celibacy and obedience according to the Constitutions of a pontifically recognized community of women religious.  No, my community does not wear a habit but we do wear our "Peace Cross" as a symbol of identity with the Congregation.  Yes, there are other young women entering religious life, and yes they are entering a wide variety of religious communities, including my own. And yes I am very happy I took the plunge and sometimes can't believe how much sense I make in this life.

If you are maybe possibly considering that religious life might be where you make the most sense, you might want to check out this blog post about Vision Magazine.

If you know a young woman who might make sense as a religious Sister, why not tell her that? In a low key, non-scary way of course.  I might never have stopped long enough to listen if my pastor hadn't had a conversation with me one day along those lines.

Speaking of, this week the US Bishops Conference blog is featuring posts by younger religious and priests.  I wrote a blog post that tells my vocation story, including that invitation to consider religious life.  I think my post will be online tomorrow (Wednesday), but you can read the other posts already posted yesterday and today.

The moral of the story is that God is still calling.  Please join me in prayer and hope that women and men who are being called to religious life or the priesthood will be able to find the space in the hearts and busy lives to listen, ponder and consider answering yes.

More Discerning Women

I started this blog eight years ago this month, believe it or not.  At the time I was just starting the journey of considering religious life and discerning with my religious community.  As I said in my first post:

I've searched the blogsphere myself, looking for the "What should Susan do with her life website" to no avail. I have, however, been lucky enough to stumble upon the stories of others who have been able to stop and listen to what God might be calling them too. I've benefitted from the struggles, the sharing, the hopes, the fears of complete strangers. And so, I figured it was worth the risk to start documenting my own journey in the hopes that it strikes a chord with someone else. Gives someone else the thought that it's not so crazy to listen to that voice deep down inside that won't go away, the idea that maybe there's something more to this life thing. 

Readers of the blog followed along on my journey through inquirer, pre-candidate, candidate, novice, and temporary professed Sister. Now of course, I'm a boring perpetually professed Sister and graduate theology student. The discernment journey is all there in the archives for folks who are interested of course.  And I'm still a discerning woman, discerning each day how best to live fully and respond to God's incredible love for me in service of our broken world.  I still try to share my musings from time to time. This blog is part of who I am now and how I relate to the world.

I thought regular readers might be interested in some blogs I've discovered of young women who are discerning religious life.  It seems that more and more women are listening to that still small voice inside and saying yes!  Given the theme of Mary's yes that is such a great source of reflection for me each Advent, I thought I'd point out some of these blogs so you can hear the stories of young women saying yes to religious life.

• My friend Amanda is a postulant with the Daughters of Charity.  She blogs at Drink Deeply my Daughter.
• My friend Juliet recently professed first vows as a Religious of the Sacred Heart of Jesus.  She blogs at Communitas et Caritas.
• I've gotten to know Colleen through a mutual friend.  She is a novice with the Sisters of St. Joseph of Philadelphia and blogs at Wandering in Wonder.
• And just today I discovered the blog of Tracy who is in her first year of formation with the Sisters of Charity of Cincinnati.  She blogs at Diary of a Sister in Training.

Please keep these women and all discerning a religious vocation especially in your prayers this Advent.

If you are someone who has been thinking that maybe, quite possibly, perhaps God might be calling them to a religious vocation, remember that my email box is always open.  There's a link to my email in the side bar.  I'm not a vocation director or anything, but as someone who has followed her heart into religious life and found such joy, I'm happy to share my experience, be a listening ear or support others on their journey in any way I can.

Blessings of Advent Peace
Sister Susan