my friend goo ... I mean God

At the mountain of God, Horeb,
Elijah came to a cave, where he took shelter.
But the word of the LORD came to him,
“Go outside and stand on the mountain before the LORD;
the LORD will be passing by.”
A strong and heavy wind was rending the mountains
and crushing rocks before the LORD—but the LORD was not in the wind.
After the wind there was an earthquake— but the LORD was not in the earthquake.
After the earthquake there was fire— but the LORD was not in the fire.
After the fire there was a tiny whispering sound.
When he heard this,
Elijah hid his face in his cloak
and went and stood at the entrance of the cave.
A voice said to him, “Elijah, why are you here?
”He replied, “I have been most zealous for the LORD,the God of hosts."
(I Kings 19)

All these years later, we still could stand to learn the lesson Elijah learned that day on the mountain. Back when I was first wondering if maybe possibly there was something to this whole vocation thing, a wise friend reminded me that I seemed to be waiting for a SIGN – wind, earthquake, fire – rather than being attentive to the tiny whispering sounds of my heart. She was right of course.

Likewise, I think back to the times when I was convinced God was not present and was beside myself with anger at said God for that very reason. The most poignant example of this was the time in my life when my mom was close to death and suffering unimaginably. I have a few dear friends who are most likely experiencing similar thoughts right now as they journey with loved ones through serious illness … and some that are ill themselves. It is still hard for me at times to reconcile the existence of suffering with an ever present God.

My friend Susie has a little sign in her kitchen that says “There is no place where God is not.” Of course, I always laugh at this sign because the word “God” looks like “Goo” – and being a Sonic Youth fan, I find this extremely funny. But that is off topic. Or is it? Just as there is no place where God is not, "goo" - the messes of life, suffering, violence, etc... - also seems to have a habit of seeping into all areas of our world. God & goo, together forever?

The place I finally come to where I find some peace on the whole coexistence of God & suffering thing is this …. God is present in the suffering. More than that, Jesus suffered, died and was buried and so, God knows human suffering. God knows humans.

And sometimes, at those moments when you’re sure God’s nowhere to be found, off duty or helping someone else, you hear that small voice, that whispering wind. It might be in the laughter of a child. Or the kindness of a stranger. Or the grace and peace in knowing that your loved one lived a good life.